| 9/06/2005 |
THERE AIN'T NO CURE FOR THE SUMMERTIME BLUES by The Who
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Open Letter To Labor Day Weekend:
You've changed man? What happened to you? You used to be cool. But now? Not so much.
Don't get me wrong. I still think you are great person and I enjoy hanging out with you. Yet, things are just not the same anymore.
When I was younger it was great to see you. A new school year would have just started. Then, no more than a week (two at the most) went by and... BAM! Vacation! It was a nice reminder than even though Fall was chasing Summer away, there was still some fight left in you. "Go out with a bang," you'd always say. One last hooray to let Summer know that you'd miss her while she was gone.
Yet now? You seem to have lost your luster. That twinkle in your eye. That spark of enthusiasm that showed Summer we still cared. Is it because I don't write as often as I should? Is it because I have a day job? Is it because I don't spend as much time looking forward to your wonderful 3-Day weekend, because now I have Floating Holiday Time that I can use whenever I feel I need a 3-Day weekend? Are you bitter about all the shopping malls and car dealerships hoarding people and activity in your name?
I know you've been fighting with Halloween a lot lately. He can't be content being the main holiday in his own month. He has to take over yours as well?! I can understand. I'd be upset if I were you. I think that general retail has a lot to do with that. You don't have any marketability. No catchy tunes. No mascots. You don't even have a color scheme! Whoever told Father Christmas that bright green and fire engine red look good together was lying. Have you spoken with a lifestyles consultant and had your colors done? It's kinda cool. I'm a Fall. Go figure. The two colors I hated the most as a kid ended up being two of my favorites. Red and Green? But not together! I'm not working at a John Deere Dealership or Scotch Tape.
But anyway... Where was I?
Oh yeah. So, I'm not really asking you to take up some extreme sport or go on one of those "reality" shows to boost your popularity. I don't want to see you whoring yourself out to Skating With The Stars. The last thing you want to do is show up to a party thinking your 'hip' and 'with-it' only to have everyone looking at you and talking behind your back about how inappropriate you look in those low-rise jeans, with Tara Reid clinging to your arm like holiday flab. "He's just trying to hard," they'll say. "Poor Labor Day... Trying to reclaim his glory days."
You don't have to try and be the cool, fun, exciting Labor Day I remember for when I was a kid. Just don't let yourself be pushed around be others. Take a stand! Grab the calendar by the cajones and remind us how much fun Summer was. Reassure us that we can still have fun with Fall, and that Summer will be back soon enough. She's just on world tour. You can catch her act in Australia and most places in the Southern Hemisphere.
Call me. We can get together for lunch now that your schedule has freed up.
P.S. - Ditch the blonde. You're too good for her. |
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I posted this @ 9/06/2005 10:07:00 AM.............Need a link?..........
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