The Comical Misadventures of a Rambling Mind
MAD WORLD by Gary Jules

While it wasn’t planned this way, it ended up being a pretty lazy weekend.

I did watch Donnie Darko over the weekend. More on that in a minute. I guess it is a little ironic that I watched a movie with a demonic looking bunny on Easter weekend.

I have spring fever bad!! We have been having more and more good weather days. Even the mediocre days are still welcome. It was rainy for a few days last week and just the smells of moist, fresh, and green were thick in the air. Good times. I can’t wait for the days where it is warm enough to open the windows of the apartment or to be able to drive around with the windows down without freezing to death. While I am ok with the cold. I prefer the warm/hot. Actually, I prefer the ‘knowing.’ In the Summer I know it’ll be hot. It the Winter I know it’ll be cold. The Spring and Fall are a little less predictable. Other than being predictable for being unpredictable.

Either way… Spring is here! Let the sun shine in!

Ok, now after all that sunshine and happiness I bring you:

Donnie Darko – (C+) When looking at movies that have come out I don’t take what critics say too seriously. I will read what fans have to say about the film, but even then I take it with a grain of salt. I’d heard this was one of those ‘cult classic’ films. You get a small devoted group of fans who know everything about the film. This movie is great for them, but for the rest of us… find Cliff's Notes.

The movie had a great cast. Jake Gyllenhaal, Drew Barrymore, Noah Wyle, Mary McDonnell, and Patrick Swayze of all people. Donnie, (Gyllenhall) is going a little mad. He's acting out in school. His shrink has him for weekly hypnosis sessions. Did I mention he also has a demonic bunny rabbit, named Frank, for a 'friend.' Yeah... Donnie seems to be a little off. Frank isn't as bad as he seems. He does save Donnie from a freak accident and leads him to 'help' others in a backhanded fashion. There are so many little questions about this film. After a while they start piling up. By the end I was hoping for some answer to what I had been watching for the last two hours. Did Donnie figure out how to travel through time? Was Frank a 'real' time traveling Sacajawea or just a product of Donnie's mind? Did Patrick Swayze know what type of movie he was auditioning for or had his career hit 'that' level?

I'm torn on this movie. I liked the acting. I liked the overall story that was being told. I was unhappy that it was left somewhat up to the viewers interpretation as to what certain things meant. That it typically difficult for me. I can lose myself in a movie. Yet, if the movie asks me to then report back what I thought I learned from it, I'm screwed. There was so much that was left open for interpretation that I was struggling to figure it out. Like reading a mystery novel that is ends by the author saying... "Who do you think did it? The butler? No... Look deeper. Who had it done to them?" In the end, there were too many loose ends that were tied up in slipknots. I think it was meant to be that way so we could decide for ourselves what things meant, but this isn't the type of movie that people are going to debate at the water cooler.

Good... story. Great cast. A lot of interesting possibility. It is refreshing to see a science fiction movie that isn't relying solely on special effects.

Bad... idea to have too many open ended questions that don't have answers by the end of the film. So debate I can handle finishing a movie. Too much to debate and I'm only left with questions.

See it... when you can rent it and have time to watch it a couple times to gleam all you can from it. Or if you decide to find an explination to the film there is always the internet handy.
I posted this @ 3/28/2005 02:41:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


Easter makes me think of The Ten Commandments. It was always shown on TV about this time of year and typically interrupted what would've been a regularly viewed event. Sometimes Murder She Wrote would be replaced by a showing of one of these. It was a tragic time.

In the spirit of Easter and The Almighty I thought I'd share a list I came across. Who knew that there might have been so many things He wanted to make sure we followed. AnyWHO...

Commandments the Almighty Decided to Drop in His Seventh Revision So As Not to Overwhelm His Chosen People.

- - - -

Thou shalt not lick thy lips whilst they are dry, else they shall dry even more. Really, they shall just get drier.

- - - -

Do not take thy Lord's name and useth it to promoteth personal-hygiene products.

- - - -

Thou shalt not strip off thy clothes at an oasis, dip thy hips below the surface, come out, sit in the sand before drying thy backside, then standing, else thou shalt have to wait for thy skin to dry before thou can brush it off, even after which thou shalt still have sparkly bits which will not come off nor stop sparkling until ye dip thy hips below the oasis surface again.

- - - -

Thou shalt not quip, nor for that matter perform any act which starteth with the letter "q," such as "quibble" or "quell" or "query," without a self-addressed stamped envelope.

- - - -

If at first thou doth not succeed, attempteth and attempteth again.

- - - -

Thou shalt not "know" thyself lest ye shall grow hair from thine palm or havest thy sight taken away.

- - - -

If some violation doth befall thy left eye, thou might perform a similar act on the left eye of thy persecutor, unless thy persecutor already hath borne some act on said eye, in which case thou may perform a similar act on said persecutor's right eye, unless the villain hath had both eyes smoten, in which case thou will be considered above reproach even if thou useth a chair which might be crafted to channel lightning or filleth a room with deadly vapors or injecteth the venom of a viper, to maketh sure said blind scumbag never poketh again.

- - - -

If thy neighbor canst keep from "knowing" another outside of wedlock or is forcibly "known" or for whatever reason decides they regret being in the "know," thou shalt not do or say a goddamn thing about their choice.

- - - -

If thou assumest, thou maketh an ass out of thou and the Lord thy God.

- - - -

If these tablets should dissolve over time into dust, the dust will be put in an ark which henceforth shall be referred to as Ark of the Covenant, to be protected by a wide variety of serpents. Should said ark fall into the hands of evil Nazis who are stupid enough to open it, archaeology-professor adventurers should closeth their eyes so they may survive and insure the ark be placed in a large warehouse where it will be lost in obscurity.
I posted this @ 3/27/2005 07:55:00 AM.............Need a link?..........

UP, UP, & AWAY by The Fifth Dimension

I don't think I'll be piloting any rescue helicopters after my miserable scores.
I posted this @ 3/24/2005 02:59:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


This story is absolutely incredible... and pretty damned funny to boot. Tho, it makes me want to try it just to see what would happen. I won't. But it makes me want to.
I posted this @ 3/22/2005 04:17:00 PM.............Need a link?..........

HAIR by Hair Soundtrack

I've never had great hair. I've never had "Gee, your hair looks terrific!" I am resolved thatone day I will not have as much hair as I do now, (and that ain't sayingm much).

My Grandmother was a hairstylist for years. After a while, I went to someone else in town. Since I moved I've found a new person to cut my hair. I like the person who cuts my hair. She is younger than I am. Perky. Funny. She makes the usual banter that barbers do, asking about holidays, movies that might be out lately, local events, etc... Typical I hate small-talk. I'm not good at it. So I don't say a whole lot while sitting in the chair unless it is something that I actually have done or have some anecdote to share.

But I'm getting off track... My hair does wacky things. I wake up looking like my hair goes ten rounds with my pillow and lost. I have a cowlick on the side of my head that has a tendency to not want to do anything other than what it is programmed to do by mad scientist at Vidal Sassoon. I will have good and bad hair days like anyone else. So it's not always an issue. Yet to someone who cuts hair, they notice these things whether you are having a good hair day or not.

Knowing this is a possibility in patrons, there are some things that a barber shouldn't say. Or should at least phrase differently. As a plastic surgeon, you want to let your patient tell you why they are there. Don't 'suggest' reasons why they might be visiting you. Same for a hairstylist.

I had just finished working out and stopped by the shop to have my hair cut. I sit down in the chair. I tell her what I'd like done to my hair. She begins. As she gets to where my cowlick is she asks, "Is that bedhead?"

What?! It's five o'clock in the evening. While the chances that I might have just woke up are there, they are minimal. Either way, don't offer theories.

"Is yours?! Afterall it is obvious that you and your shop-mates have all recently learned how to streak and flip this ends up on a head of hair as it is evident that you practiced this technique on each other all afternoon. Your resemblence to a Hair Style Barbie that has undergone a 'small trim' from a michevious sibling is alarming!" Oh wait... I actually said, "No."

It has become a running joke now.

I put aside this momentary lapse in tact on her part and I still go to her for haircuts.

At my last visit, when I sat down in the chair she started off by asking, "Is this the funny side?" pointing to my head.

"Yes. It tells me jokes all the time. Why just before I walked in, it was telling me a joke about how your spoltchy hair color was reminiscent of a zebra or other striped mammal." I mean... "Yeah."

Tact!! There are some jobs that just require a bit more tact than others. She's new. She'll learn.
I posted this @ 3/21/2005 02:42:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


I'm back in a Netflix swing. Watching and returning movies with lightning speed!

Life Is Beautiful - (No Rating) The movie won awards. I'm sure it is a good film, but I had it for a LONG long time and it didn't make it into the dvd player. Maybe I'll rent it another time when I feel like it. Yet for now... Sorry Roberto.

The Forgotten - (B-) I can see why this movie didn't take the big screen by storm. While it is supenseful, with it's twists and turns. It has a hard reputation to live up to when you've got films like The Sixth Sense, A Beautiful Mind, & The Usual Suspects raising the bar on what a movie can lead us to believe. I like Julianne Moore as an actress. She plays the part of a greiving mother on the brink of losing her sanity quite well. The viewers are slapped in the face with a not-so-subtle hint as to what the reason is behind her son's mysterious disapperance and death. Without giving the ending away, I'm not sure if I would've like to have had the reason withheld till closer to the end or not. Watching it, your thinking goes from 'How' to 'Why.' For me, the how is more intriguing when it comes to movies. I find that the why is usually just a passing thought so I don't invest much in hoping to be wowwed by the 'Why.'

Latter Days - (C) This movie doesn't pull any punches with the message it is trying to present. Yet because it of a low budget, C-List actors (with a couple B's thrown in here and there), and unknown or local band type soundtrack, the film has a Afterschool Special flavor to it. This would be the type of movie I'd write, if I could ever put my ideas into a coherent form. Not because of the subject, but in how it is told. One or two dimensional characters who changes their attitudes in the end. The characters act exactly how they are supposed to act. The subject matter is handled also insensatively, but that could just be me being over-sensative. I got half-way through it that by the point that I picked up my GBA and started playing it I didn't want to turn it off because I at least wanted to see how it would end.

The queue is primed and ready to send the next three films. We've got a mockumentary, a comedy, and a cult psychological thriller. A nice mix.
I posted this @ 3/21/2005 02:40:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


  1. Shape up:: or ship out!
  2. New Orleans:: Mardi Gras
  3. In the bedroom:: Miss Scarlett... with the rope...
  4. All the time:: Continuously
  5. Philosophy:: Doctrine
  6. Tyler:: Florence
  7. Disturbed:: Demeneted
  8. French kiss:: Tongue wrestling
  9. Solidify:: Harden
  10. Furtive::
I posted this @ 3/18/2005 02:44:00 PM.............Need a link?..........

GALVANIZED by The Chemical Brothers

I am shocked at the way some people come across this blog. I understand how search engines bascially work. I understand that you may find my page as a result of a series of words that aren't in the same context as you searched for on your favored Yahoogle. It is the student of human nature that makes me wonder what the state of mind was when they were searching. What about the title of this site made someone think that they might find something about the Hamburgerler or how tall Bob Sagat is? Of course it is like looking at a mirror in a mirror, because by mentioning these 'odd' searches I'm just asking for more people to come by here looking for those things.

One such searcher hoped to find information regarding "calling someone wrong name during sex." How unfortunate! While it may be a small consolation, at least it was during a moment when you could easily be focused on the moment. "Oh, Wrong Name! Kick the dog out of the room and let's do it on the futon!" As opposed to calling your significant other the wrong name during a mundane activity. "Wrong Name, have you seen the remote?" You had plenty of time to think of the right name before asking a simple question like that.

To the person who had concerns with the "jobless boyfriend who plays video games all day," I would ask this. Direct his attention to the screen for a moment.

Hello Jobless Boyfriend,

I'm sorry to hear about your job. I'm sure you worked very hard. I bet it came as quite a shock when you were downsized/fired/asked to resign because you were caught practicing liplocks with your computer monitor. Remember that there will be a better job on the horizon soon enough! Just keep looking! In the mean time... Earn your keep! Pick up the place every once in a while. Make dinner before your significant other gets home. Work on making a butt indentation on another part of the couch to "even it out." Something! Otherwise, I worry that you might find yourself homeless as well as jobless. And where will you plug in your joystick then?

Take care,
'Uncle' Cris

In other news... For those who were here looking. It's pronounced MEHN-geh-luh. Mengele. You're welcome.

Finally... I get all kinds of searches for various 'comical' related events or items. Comical pictures, phrases, softballs, you name it. But Comical diseases?! There is nothing funny about leprosy, gingivitis, or a person with webbed feet. OK... So maybe there is. But Dammit... I'm not going to have a picture of that here.

Hogs & Kittens!
I posted this @ 3/15/2005 02:55:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


  1. Usher:: Groomsman
  2. Cherish:: Adore
  3. Mistreat:: Abhor
  4. Forum:: Thread
  5. Systematic::  Calculating
  6. Warning:: Label
  7. Wash:: & Wear
  8. I wish:: you a merry Christmas
  9. Candles:: Sixteen
  10. Metallic:: -a
I posted this @ 3/07/2005 02:50:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


My latest thing has been celebrity blogs. Blogs from people that you might recognize from Music, TV, or Film. So any recent additions you might have noticed that have familiar names of people... I obviously don't know them. I just find their writings and ramblings insightful, entertaining, and/or amusing. Enjoy!
I posted this @ 3/07/2005 02:43:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


After much aniticipation on everyone's part (at least everyone who knows them) Jeni & Mike are proud parents!

Welcome to the world, Little One!

Congratulations Jeni & Mike!
I posted this @ 3/06/2005 02:37:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


I may not know the right things to say. I may not be the best at speaking my mind. So sometimes I like to point out when other people have said what I feel to be true.

Ode To Joy (Hopefully that link didn't change to something else in the meantime.)

Have we forgotten how to be happy? What type of motivation does it take to make us feel like we want to accomplish something. Or maybe it's better to put it... Have we forgotten to enjoy the simple things in life?

I used to have a picture at my desk of a serene beach setting at dusk. Beneath it read, "If a pretty poster and a cute saying are all that it takes to motivate you, you probably have an easy job. The kind robots will be doing soon."

Now while the saying is meant tounge-in-cheek, having it at my desk was meant in the same way, because I liked the job I was doing and didn't need a pretty poster or cute saying to motivate me. I didn't need a pep talk to make me want to get out of bed. I didn't need to see a baby with spaghetti on it's head to make me smile. Becuase there were everyday occurences that I had. A sunny day. A song that I knew all the words. Hearing a close friend laugh unabashedly. Feel free to break into song from the Sound of Music at any time while reading this. While things have somewhat changed, I still like being surrounded by things that make me happy, things that make me smile.

My point is... I agree with what this writer of that article is saying. "We've lost sight of rituals of happiness." We all have our own lives with our own trials and obstacles. We'll make sure our taxes are done, but how many make sure that they've smiled or been happy at some point during the day?

The article was motivated by the removal of "The Gates" from Central Park in NYC. I would've loved to have been in a position to see them. The brain child of Christo & Jeanne Claude, imagine a series of large croquet wickets that stretched for over 23 miles, with large sheets of warm yellowish-orange fabric hanging from each one.

There is an episode of The Simpsons where Homer takes a stab at being an artist, a la Christo. Very avant garde. In his grand scheme Homer snorkels all the zoo animals and, steals the welcome mats from everyone's doorsteps, and floods the town with water. Marge, who has been jealous of Homer's instant art fame, after dreaming of being a painter herself, sees how happy such a 'simple' thing has made everyone. It didn't have to be a pretty picture. It didn't have to be a motivational schpeil. It could be in the most mundane (or in this case the most sublime) of events. She'd overlooked it, forgotten about it.

So while taking the time to enjoy a parade or laugh at a good movie, sit outside in the sun or snuggle in the blankets on a cold day, might seem like there isn't time for, because you've got A, B, and C to acoomlish on your list. Would it kill us to make sure that at least one of those things is making sure we're happy?
I posted this @ 3/03/2005 02:56:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


I've never considered myself a prude. I know that I am not as worldly as some people, I also know my fair share. I will make myself laugh thinking about some of the words or phrases that I would never say in my Grandmother's presence, because the possibility is there that she might repeat it back to me. Maybe your Grandmother is cooler than mine, or you've got a different type of relationship. I've only cussed in front of my Grandmother twice. Each time I'm sure I was channeling Ralphie.

Ok... so maybe I was a prude at one point in my life. This was around the same time that I was still attending church youth group twice a week and, while I loved music, I covered my ear to keep from hearing Bon Jovi singing Living On A Prayer. Now I cover my ears when that song comes on for different reasons.

The first time I cussed in front of anyone it felt so unnatural. It felt like a word has just left my lips that was not really a word because it wasn't used in typical everyday conversation. Like shan't or ampersand...

Nowadays (uncommon itself), if you catch me in the 'right mood' you might hear a good portion of the 7 words that you can't say on television used flagrantly. Beyond simple cuss words there are a whole slew of words that are charged with the type of electricity that comes with putting down a minority or someone who doesn't have the same religion or same sexual preference. That list is much longer than a simple 7. I flinch a little when I hear them. If there is a valid reason to use any of the words I will revert to younger days and just use the first letter of the word to designate what word I mean. Even in an 'acceptable' humorous context like Will & Grace, I still flinch at some of the language. I guess I'm just sensitive like that.

As I sat in orientation for a job at a group home, we took part in an exercise where a senior staff member, typically a former group home worker, would behave as a youth might who had been deemed out of control. We were given badges that we were to write out 'hot buttons' on. This way the person who was playing the part of the out of control youth would know where to hit us where it would hurt most.

I had a very difficult time coming up with something to write down for my hot button. I'd never worked in a group home. I wasn't aware of what type of behavior an out of control youth might throw at me. Nothing really 'bothered' me. You could act like an idiot. You could threaten me. None of it really bothered me. Knowing how I felt about disparaging terms and hate-filled words. I ended up using 'hate words' as my 'hot button.' The confederate (as the youth-acting adult was called) looked at my hot button and questioned me as to what I meant. I did my best to explain, but for the same reason I didn't like or typically use such words, it wasn't like he was going to either. At least not in an exercise like this. This is on top of the absurdity of the situation to begin with. I'm talking to an adult, a professional child-rearer, who was acting like a brat. Nothing Ocsar worthy about any of the performance. I did my best not to laugh out loud. Forget trying to impress them with my mediating abilities.

I'm somewhat hypocritical in saying all this. I don't think it is appropriate or right (for lack of a more meaningful word) for anyone to call anyone else the Big N-word. I don't think that just because a person is of a certain race or religion or preference that being so unlocks a lexicological Pandora's Box. Yet, being white I'll laugh at someone calling someone else a honky or cracker in a movie or television program. Sometimes, I have a hard time making a distinction between the word and the meaning of the word. So when outpsoken activists for equality use such words to demonstrate a point I still flinch sometimes. Even though I know the words are not being used in a hateful manner, but more to illustrate a valid point.
I posted this @ 3/01/2005 02:56:00 PM.............Need a link?..........


  1. You’ve got a friend:: "Winter, Spring, Summer, or Fall"
  2. Immigration:: Settlers
  3. Waitress:: Hostess
  4. Snickers:: Satisfies
  5. Recognize:: Represent
  6. Concept:: Idea
  7. Birthday:: Party
  8. Told you so:: Nyah nyah nyahnyah nyaaah
  9. Unlikely:: Hero
  10. Extension:: of one's self
I posted this @ 3/01/2005 05:05:00 AM.............Need a link?..........


-I'm sure various people came to my blog hoping for answers to their questions such as: "who is the guy in the dr. pepper mahna mahna commercial?" I'm sorry... but I don't know. But thanks for stopping by!

-I do like myself some pepperjack cheese. It is probably the snackiest of all cheese that I've come across. Yet, for as much of it as I eat, I've never had to question what happens to it after I eat it. Yet it appears that someone visited my blog hoping for desperate answers with the concern of: "pepperjack cheese blood stool."

-While "Ronco Soup Jackson" may sound like a good band name, it was not something that I believe I recall saying was ever a good band name. Those three words couldn't be less connected if I tried. The funny thing is with some of the words or phrases that will bring up my blog are typical things that I've mentioned over the course of a couple different posts. So it may bring my blog up as one of the first three or four results. But Ronco Soup Jackson wasn't even the top ten. I hope they would found ever they were looking for.

-I'm sure "Renee Zellweger" has a "workout routine", but I don't know what it is. Once again, I didn't even come up in the top ten of results. So I am forced to assume that you came to my site because you were hypnotically drawn to it.

See what I have to offer!! Lyrics to Top 40 band Ronco Soup Jackson!!! Pictures of pepperjacked up fecal matter!!! Muppets!!! Sort of like a puppet, but not quiet a mop!!! Featuring fitness tips from Renee "Nay-nay" Zellweger!!!
I posted this @ 3/01/2005 05:01:00 AM.............Need a link?..........

I'm a 30-something student of human nature. A music-lovin', groove-shakin', laugh-inducin', dish-cookin', gossip-slingin', type of guy. This is my diary of sorts...

100 Things
How Well Do You Know Me?


Olbermann: Gay marriage is a question of love
Gay ex-governor says he's too poor for alimony
-Barack’s Gay Balance
Calif. Supreme Court rejects gay marriage ban
-Where the Bears don't fear to tread
ABBA Melody


"The Day I Helped Kill A Baby" - Joe.My.God.
"Summertime Blues" - Tomato Nation
"Mama Crazy" -
"Something I Will Never Forget" -
"OMG! It's a teenager." - Does This Mean...
"The God of Comedy Setup Lines" - Frolic & Detour
"Can't Handle The Tooth" - Hissyfit

F6 l c f+++! g+ m++ s(e)

B6 d- t k+ s u-- f i o+ x e+ l+ c

GSS d- s: a C++ W++ PS+ tv++ b+ e++ h- r++ y+

SMo/Ga/Ma A31 W+ H+ w h D+ E+ C++ e++ f Ma S+++

B3 f c-v g+ k? s--

Powered by Blogger
Weblog Commenting and Trackback by

Add to Technorati Favorites!

Counting Sheep
Originally uploaded by Fib.